Well, whaddaya know…
I did it. Got out of bed at half-five in the morning and actually exercised before my shower. Now, if I can keep it up for three weeks so that it becomes an unbreakable habit. I love this ex program…it’s called Callanetics, and it’s totally zero-impact and you can do it in your pajamas with no equipment — well, a chair is a help. (And either the video or the book to keep you on track.) But oh, the effect it has on your body. It’s amazing. If it works like it did the last time I was doing it regularly, by this time next week I will have trimmed a full dress size. Combined with the return to my proper diet (no more packets of PB crackers for breakfast), maybe I can drop 75 pounds and at least 10 dress sizes by Thanksgiving after all. Hope springs eternal.
Having trouble with the kids made me a touch late for work. I don’t know what to do about the younger one. He’s horribly distractible, and so he doesn’t get things done. They were up when I got out of my shower at 6:45, so I told them to make their beds and get their clothes on. (We lay out our clothes the night before to save morning hassles.) I made and ate breakfast, cleaned the kitchen, rebooted the laundry, brushed my teeth and hair, folded a few clothes, showed the kids that it’s snowing (a rarity here), and checked the clock. Ten of eight. Time to get dressed and head out. I’m walking down the hall, and I see that my son is still in his pajamas and has only smoothed up the sheet on his bed. He’s playing with his cars on the floor. Small spanking, large lecture.
I get myself dressed and check on number two son. Still in his pajamas. It’s now ten after 8 and time to leave. Son is playing with his Cootie game. Very large lecture, medium spanking. Large lecture at older son for distracting his brother. If we don’t leave now, I’m going to be late for work again. Older son is ready and begging to take this, that, and the other toy to Grandma’s for the day. As if Grandma didn’t have every toy known to child-kind. Besides, there’s school-work and guitar practise and outside play today. Younger son comes out of his room dressed, except no shoes. Grrrrrr. He went to the car barefoot.
I know, it sounds mean, but this child is more stubborn than your orneriest mule. He gets it from both his father and me, God help him. But he’s got to learn, and the only way I know to teach him is with the consequences: if you aren’t ready to go when mom says it’s time, you have to go as you are — dressed or not. I hate spankings. I hate it so much I am not consistent and I probably do it badly. Maybe I should just quit spanking this one. It doesn’t seem always to work with him. His brother, now, that’s different. His brother gets one spanking and never does whatever was wrong again. His brother is also a bit older and more mature. Oh well, we’ll keep working at it. These are the tough things.
On the other hand, they are so loving that it’s hard to tear myself away when I get to mom’s. The goal is to “drop them off” — to be there less than ten minutes. I’m usually managing to leave after fifteen to twenty minutes. I like to chat with mom (a grown-up!), and then there’s the multiple hugs and kisses goodbye from the kids. They like to wave to me from the porch as I pull out, which is wonderful and awful at the same time. I hate having to leave them. But what we are living now is better than what we were living when I was still married. I keep clinging to that. It’s all I have, really. It’s better now.