Bras — A Rant

It is impossible for the large-busted, well-endowed woman to find a comfortable, supportive bra to wear. I know. I’ve been amply endowed for ten years now, and I’ve tried every bra on the market.

It’s even worse when you have the smaller proportions of a petite frame, as I do. Petite isn’t about size, it’s about measurements. The distance between my shoulders, the length of my torso, the length of my inseam, and the distance from my waist to my shoulder are all shorter than those same measurements would be for a person of average proportions.

So, for example, the new underwire bra I bought yesterday is now poking me in the armpit with the end of the underwire, and I can’t get the straps short enough to get a better fit. And it’s a shame, because the fabric of the bra doesn’t itch, and it’s comfortable except for this blasted wire poking holes in my underarm.

I have the same problem with long-lines — and I love long-line bras. I always have to take out the stays under the arms, as they poke me mercilessly. The other stays are fine, but the ones under the arm are too long.

I can’t wear regular bras. The band that goes around the torso invariably rolls into a tight, constricting tourniquet that makes breathing difficult and causes painful indentations in the skin. And that band always rides up until it’s sitting on top of my shoulder blades, leaving my boobs dangling around my navel. I wear long-lines because even if they fold over, there’s enough extra fabric that I retain some support, and the back cannot ride up so far.

And then there’s the fabrics. I’ve had to start wearing a thin cotton camisole under all of my bras, because the fabrics used in constructing most brassieres make me break out in a rash. And they are scratchy and rough. Stretch straps are a joke. My endowments are so heavy that they stretch the straps to the point that I have absolutely no support at all. I prefer a good, cotton strap that doesn’t have a lot of give. They hold things up and in, as they are supposed to.

I’ve been professionally fitted. I know how a bra is supposed to fit, and I know what my real size is. I’m not trying to wear something that’s too small. But I have not, in ten years, found a bra that I don’t want to rip off ten minutes after putting it on. And I certainly haven’t found one that gives me adequate support. I think I’ll go back to my corset and camisole. At least with them, I have plenty of support, I never look down and find that I have four boobs instead of two (or tummy boobs instead of chest boobs), and I never break out in a rash. And while I can’t bend at the waist when wearing it, I can lift boxes and things without having a strap break or a band twist itself into a tourniquet around my midriff.

Tags: clothes, obesity, rant