Drama, Bad News, Rock Bottom
“I was set free because my greatest fear had been realized and I was still alive … and so, rock bottom became the foundation on which I rebuilt my life.”
— JK Rowling, commencement address to Harvard University, June 2008
Rock Bottom. That’s where I am. But before you can know why, you need some background.
Two weeks ago, I posted in this blog that I was getting all the recommended tests preparatory to re-starting the Atkins Diet. One of the tests is the glucose tolerance test, which I was having done that day. Well, the lab mixed up my samples and sent back ludicrously off-base readings.
So I had the GTT re-done last Thursday, with plans to re-start the diet as soon as I had the results in hand.
I really was expecting that I would be told my results were normal, that my sugars were a bit on the high side, and to go ahead with my plans.
Well, I was told to go ahead with my plans, but the rest of the news I got yesterday was ghastly. I have diabetes. Not the pre-diabetes I’ve been stuck with for more than a decade, but the real deal. The whole nasty ball o’ wax.
Well, that was a real downer. As in, rock bottom. No further down to go. BAM! I’m still so depressed I can barely function. But function I will, because life must go on, and the only direction I can go now is up.
I started my diet today. I will probably stay on Induction (20g carb daily) until I just can’t stand it anymore, and then I will go very slowly with the increases. I also start beginner karate classes tonight. It will be interesting to see how that goes. I’ve never done anything like it in my life. But my 9-year-old is very interested and the dojo we’ve chosen encourages full-family participation. So I will do it with the 9-year-old on Tuesdays, when the 11-year-old and his dad are at Boy Scouts, and then the X will do it with both boys on Thursdays, while I do what I want. Free time! What a concept!
Starting stats, for anyone who cares:
- Weight: 235 lb
- BMI: 43
- Waist to hip ratio: 0.8 (which is supposed to be healthy, LOL! But with a 40-inch waist and 50-inch hips, it’s kind of debatable. When I was 18 and weighed 98 pounds, my waist:hip ratio was 0.8. My waist is always, invariably, 10 inches smaller than my hips. I have no doubt that if my hips were 100 inches, my waist would be 90 inches.)
Wish me luck.